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| title | type |
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| Quotes I Like | page |
Just some quotes I like. The date in front of a quote indicates when it was Quote of the Day. I also have a fortune of the day website that updates without fail every UTC midnight.
"Perfection is achieved, not when there is nothing more to add, but when there is nothing left to take away."
- Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
"With enough bugs, all eyes are shallow."
- John Tobey
"I'm not young enough to know everything."
- J. M. Barrie
"Multitasking is the enemy of focus."
- Anonymous
"The early bird catches the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese."
- Ernst Berg
"In theory, theory and practice are the same. In practice, they're not."
- Yogi Berra (Misattributed)
source .bash_history
- Randall Munroe
rm -rf $DIRECTROY/*
- Randall Munroe
echo "source .bashrc" >> .bashrc
- Randall Munroe
2023-01-26 "The universe tends toward maximum irony. Don't push it."
- Jamie Zawinski
"Don't worry about what anybody else is going to do. The best way to predict the future is to invent it."
- Alan Kay
"In China, programs have to be certified by the government in order to be used on computers there, which sounds an awful lot like the Apple store."
- Bruce Schneier
"Against the average user, anything works; there's no need for complex security software. Against the skilled attacker, on the other hand, nothing works."
- Bruce Schneier
"As someone once said, "Just because you're not interested in politics does not mean that politics won't be interested in you." And staying away from politics either because you think tech will make laws irrelevant or because there's no good way to influence laws just opens the field for people who don't cherish either of those illusions to make things very bad indeed."
- Cory Doctorow
"Give a man a program, frustrate him for a day. Teach a man to program, frustrate him for a lifetime."
- Francesco Napoletano
"And a computer nerd therefore is somebody who uses a computer in order to use a computer."
- Douglas Adams
"We are stuck with technology when what we really want is just stuff that works."
- Douglas Adams
"Irrationality is the square root of all evil."
- Douglas Hofstadter
"Talk is cheap. Show me the code."
- Linus Torvalds
"Really, I'm not out to destroy Microsoft. That will just be a completely unintentional side effect."
- Linus Torvalds
"Most days I wake up thinking I'm the luckiest bastard alive."
- Linus Torvalds
"I am a lazy person, which is why I like open source, for other people to do work for me."
- Linus Torvalds
"Portability is for people who cannot write new programs."
- Linus Torvalds
"Only wimps use tape backup: real men just upload their important stuff on ftp, and let the rest of the world mirror it ;)"
- Linus Torvalds
"I'd like to say that I knew this would happen, that it's all part of the plan for world domination."
- Linus Torvalds
"The infinite possibilities each day holds should stagger the mind. The sheer number of experiences I could have is uncountable, breathtaking, and I'm sitting here refreshing my inbox. We live trapped in loops, reliving a few days over and over, and we envision only a handful of paths laid out before us. We see the same things every day, we respond the same way, we think the same thoughts, each day a slight variation on the last, every moment smoothly following the gentle curves of societal norms. We act like if we just get through today, tomorrow our dreams will come back to us. And no, I don't have all the answers. I don't know how to jolt myself into seeing what each moment could become. But I do know one thing: the solution doesn't involve watering down my every little idea and creative impulse for the sake of some day easing my fit into a mold. It doesn't involve tempering my life to better fit someone's expectations. It doesn't involve constantly holding back for fear of shaking things up. This is very important, so I want to say it as clearly as I can: FUCK. THAT. SHIT."
- Randall Munroe
"There's real poetry in the real world. Science is the poetry of reality."
- Richard Dawkins
"I like quoting Einstein. Know why? Because nobody dares contradict you."
- Studs Terkel
"Any fool can write code that a computer can understand. Good programmers write code that humans can understand."
- Martin Fowler
"Why is "abbreviation" such a long word?"
- Anonymous
"I have no special talents. I am only passionately curious."
- Albert Einstein
"I think that it's extraordinarily important that we in computer science keep fun in computing. When it started out, it was an awful lot of fun. Of course, the paying customers got shafted every now and then, and after a while we began to take their complaints seriously. We began to feel as if we really were responsible for the successful, error-free perfect use of these machines. I don't think we are. I think we're responsible for stretching them, setting them off in new directions, and keeping fun in the house. I hope the field of computer science never loses its sense of fun. Above all, I hope we don't become missionaries. Don't feel as if you're Bible salesmen. The world has too many of those already. What you know about computing other people will learn. Don't feel as if the key to successful computing is only in your hands. What's in your hands, I think and hope, is intelligence: the ability to see the machine as more than when you were first led up to it, that you can make it more."
- Alan Perlis
2023-01-24 "Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that."
- George Carlin
2023-01-27 "A conclusion is simply the place where someone got tired of thinking."
- Unknown
"A little inaccuracy sometimes saves tons of explanation."
- H. H. Munroe, "Saki"
2023-01-25 "An idiot with a computer is a faster, better idiot."
- Rich Julius
"Never surrender to fascist zebras to cosplaying as unicorns."
- Rei in pilogy
2023-01-28 "Tell 5 of your friends about Quote of the Day, and receive a FREE Quote of the Day!!!"
- Me
"Manifest Destiny often times ends in dysentery."
- James Mickens (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ajGX7odA87k)
"Whoever just pinged @everyone, ple@se st@y @w@y from the @ key unless it's @n emergency. Th@nks!"
- ChatGPT
"The kid was deliberately and maliciously watching television at him."
- Douglas Adams
"The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't."
- Douglas Adams
"Ugly implicit complex complicated bourgeoisie bruxists, reveal yourselves!"
- The Comptroller in pilogy
"And, let's not forget about lychee jelly, the perfect complement to any military dictatorship."
- Lilianne in pilogy
"As for C++, I'll just say that the last time I tried using it, I was having problems with their std::list and tried searching it up online, but only got results of lists of STDs. So I think that says quite a lot about C++."
- Guido van Rossum in pilogy
"There are 10 kinds of people in the world. Those who know binary, and nine kinds of people that don't."
- Recurring joke in pilogy
"Ughhh I can't BELIEVE it!!! Different couNtriEs haVING different RAILway GAAAUGES?! ThAt's just SO unFAIR! It's SO inCOHErEnt and FRUstratING! I meAn, sure, wonDERful colORs, fanTAsTic SOUNDS, and oh-so-KAWaIi amBIENCE is deLIGHTful on its own, BUT how anNOYing is it thAT your faVORite mechaNIcal poeTry on whEELS can't even RUN THE SAME GAUGE as the counTRY nextdoor?! It's just SO baKAYAROU!! No ONE should even HAVE to THINK abOUT this--it SHOuld just BE!! It's a serIOUS TRAINfic JAM!! SPREAD the RAIlLOVE!"
- Tsuki in pilogy
"I'll just use the Python pickle module to pickle all the kids... I assure you, it's completely safe and completely legal."
- Guido van Rossum in pilogy
"Sorry sensei, I totally forgot to do my homework because I was caught up in this epic quest to save Null Island from a rogue spambot invasion. I was so engrossed in it that I lost track of time and ended up binge-watching xkcd comics instead. And then, my Roomba got possessed by a Trumpism virus and I had to Rewrite it in Rust to stop it from taking over my house. Plus, I had to prepare heart disease-inducing macaroni and cheese for my sick Tsar-Bomba-wielding grandfather, who refused to eat anything else. And just when I thought things couldn't get any crazier, I got a message from Robert Mugabe inviting me to a Nando's chicken eating contest while riding an Excitebike. Needless to say, my bogomips were maxed out and my brain was fried. Can I get an extension?"
- An email to Gerrit FFFFFF in pilogy
"Copy the kids, not the reference. Copy them. You know you want to copy them. You can't deep copy a shallow mind."
- [To Be Filled By O.E.M.] in pilogy
"You gotta keep your balance as the water bottles are expanding."
- Me
"Having dictator on your resume is not very good."
- Guido van Rossum in pilogy
"You're doing the walking taco?"
- Me
"These fries are just integer partitions of potatoes."
- Me
"Imagine what the banana would look like if it could segfault... You could run the banana in a debugger!" - Me
"I think I'm eating the circular fry from the wrong dimension."
- Me
"Why do all the buildings look like someone took a bite out of them?"
- Me
"Place the walking Seattle"
- Me
"I gummy wormed the test."
- Me
"What if you get microwaved by a malicious server?"
- Me
"It's like vanilla but evilified."
- Me
"Getting impeached once is a skill issue, getting impeached twice is a mental disorder."
- Me
"I want to see the universe in debug mode."
- Me
"A programmer had a problem. He thought to himself, 'I know, I'll solve it with threads!'. has Now problems. two he"
- Stack Exchange
"We're trying to figure out how to report capital gains from time traveling on our tax returns."
- Me
"Always be sincere, even when you don't mean it."
- Irene Peter
"I distinctly remember forgetting that."
- Clara Barton
"We must believe in free will. We have no choice."
- Isaac B. Singer
"No one goes to that restaurant anymore--it's always too crowded."
- Yogi Berra
"It isn't an optical illusion. It just looks like one."
- Unknown
"I am a deeply superficial person."
- Andy Warhol
"Some bird populations soaring down"
- Headline of an article in Science News, page 126, February 20, 1993
"I don't think anyone should write their autobiography until after they're dead."
- Samuel Goldwyn
"Things will get better despite our efforts to improve them."
- Will Rogers
"A student who changes the course of history is probably taking an exam."
- Unknown
"Hey, it's not my fault that I'm insane. I blame complicated societal, biological, political, and astrophysiological factors completely outside of my control!"
- Some random anime girl
"Bagels are the bomb, especially if you 9/11 them with a generous schmear of cream cheese."
- ChatGPT
"Mooncake, resistance against our acquisistion is futile. Do not fear, this is for a benevolent cause. We are going to shave the Labradoodle!"
- Cheetos
"That countertop is as unique as a mutant rabbit that can shoot venom out of its nose! We just have to go through every house in Shanghai on realtor.com until we find one with that countertop!"
- Cheetos
"They tried to take me down, but I'm still standing here, taller and stronger than ever. I'm like the Twin Towers. They threw everything at me, but I'm still standing, except maybe if they threw an airplane at me."
- Donald Trump
"War does not determine who is right--only who is left."
- Bertrand Russell
"An escalator cannot break, it can only become stairs."
- Mitch Hedberg
"Meow means "woof" in cat."
- George Carlin
"We will all go directly to our own respective Valhallas/Do not pass go, do not collect two hundred dallahs."
- Tom Lehrer
"Always go to other people's funerals; otherwise they won't go to yours."
- Yogi Berra (Misattributed)
"I hate eating crunchy fish eggs on sushi. Every bite is like an abortion."
- Anonymous
"A plane wants to fly; a helicopter wants to crash."
- Anonymous
"It is said that you die twice -- once when you draw your last breath, and once when the last person who knew your name dies. In computer science, this is called 'garbage collection'."
- Brion Vibber
"If procrastination was an Olympic sport, I'd probably start training for it... tomorrow."
- Anonymous
"It will make you laugh! It will make you cry! It will make you try mayonnaise-frosted pie!"
- Blurb for pilogy